My friends baby died, help me?

i say a friend i mean a friend of a friend,well she was 7 months pregnant and she had to deliver it dead, she was all ready for the baby to arrive, it happend a few days ago, but i only see her at friends partys maybe new year, i am so gutted for them i have been despressed since i found out i cannot begin to imagine what it is like being her right now, never seeing her 1st child smile laugh cry or walk, i cant stop crying and cant stop thinking about it,

can anyone help me get over this, like advice i cant seem to get out of bed and havent got dressed since,

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I had a miscarriage at 11 weeks, three days after my brother (my best friend) died as the result of a hit and run. Sometimes it sounds more horrible to someone else. I had my faith to help me through. I remember lying in bed in horrible pain (worse than the delivery of my full term 10 lb 6 oz daughter without drugs) crying and thinking over and over again "why me?". After about an hour, another thought popped into my head. "Why Not Me?" I believe that was Gods way of answering me. Could I think of any other person in the world, even someone I absolutely hated, that I would rather have this happen to? I couldn't. It happens to someone every day, and this time it was me. I know now that it happened for a reason. I have heard that all my life (everything happens for a reason). I always thought is was just soemthing people said when the didn't know what else to say. I was one of the lucky few who got to see why mine happened. My sister and I were both due on the same day. If I had still been pregnant when she went into Labor, I wouldn't have been there for her delivery. About one hour after delivery, she went to the restroom, and I stood outside the door in case she passed out. As I stood there, I noticed that she seemed to be peeing forever. A line from that movie Jerry Mguire came to me suddenly (the human bladder only holds 3 ounces), and I realized that that thing they give you to pee in is about 2 cups or 16 ounces! She was hemmoraghing. If I hand't been there, she would have bled to death. I could not have survived losing both my brother and my sister six months apart. God has his reasons for everything. I became pregnant six weeks after my miscarriage, and now she is three years old. My daughter is developmentally delayed, and I don't beleive I would have been able to deal with it as well as I have if I hadn't been shown first just how fortunate I am to have a child at all! I truly understand and appreciate the gifts that I have recieved. One thing that did help me through and may help her a little is a song I heard afterward. It is called "My Name" by an artist named George Canyon. He wrote it when one of his friends and neighbor lost their baby in a manner similar to what you have described. Now it is on my MP3 player, and I love to hear it. It makes me smile and think of my baby playing in heaven with my brother until I can do so myself.

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If that's how you feel, imagine how they must feel and what they are going through!
It is very sad, but evidently something was terribly wrong with the baby and it was prob better off, at least it is not fighting for life, hurting anymore!!! I am not trying to sound heartless, because i have had 2 miscarriages, but it happened for a reason and it will take a long time to get over!!!!
Ok so this person's problems have now become yours. You need to get up out of bed and look around and see that you have much to be thankful for. If you feel bad for this friend call her up and invite her to lunch. There isnt anything you can say to help when it comes to the baby but you can just treat her the same as before and be there for her if she needs to talk.
This is my biggest fear- No words you have will help those parents- They have a funeral for a baby rather than a welcome home celebration. I understand how you are feeling. There is a book called "Ill hold you in heaven" You may even want to think about getting it for them and leaving it on there door step. Keep your head up hun. just pray for them. They are hurting so much
I honestly think that the only way to get over such a problem (one that can't be fixed) is to realize what you still have and what it means to you. It might take awhile but I think it will help.
Maybe it would make you feel better if you got in touch with the woman who actually had the baby. Dont let her know that you are totally bumbed, but tell her you have been thinking about her and hope she's well and ask if there is anything you can do for her. She is hurting too, but she may have a good way of dealing with it. So see if you can be aorund her and help her out. But do not mention how effected you are, that could make her feel worse.

Good Lucka nd Big Hugs frm NC!
The best way for you to get passed this is do something nice for her..even if its a card,a poem,flower, a locket,etc and send it to her in the mail or through a friend and say i dont know you very well but i feel your pain for your loss and this is my only way i know how to express this ....something like that...giving is the best way to feel good about yourself
all i can tell you is pray, my wife and i lost two babies early on in our marriage...one was misscarried at 6 months and the other passed away at four weeks old of sids....we are bot h christians and the only thing that got us through this terrible time was god....nothing anybody says or does can take away the pain of loosing a child be ot your first or fifth so all you can do is go on day to day knowing that god has a plan for you and something you have to do later on...in our case fourteen years later after we had given up the hope of children in our lives we had twins ..boy and girl...they are now 4 years old and healthy and happy kids. we just figured that we have been given back the two we lost earlier and that the reason we lost them was at that point in time we were not ready to have them as we are now.... so please stop grieving give god a chance and know that everything happens for a reason...is it better to have a child pass before birth or live with the possibility of being brain damaged or some other birth defect??? well that why babies usually do live...there is an underlying cause for the death...only god knows honey...only god...
Hearing about someone elses losses or grief can be difficult for anyone and even remind you of your own losses. If you have a history (or family history) of depression go seek professional help but otherwise call a friend or loved one and don't be alone. Someone else can help you move on and keep your mind off of the other womans sad situation. Also maybe talk with your friend who's friend it was and see if you can do anything to help her. Good luck and staying in bed will just make it harder.
%26gt; "can anyone help me get over this, like advice i cant seem to get out of bed and havent got dressed since,"

I think you need to get some counseling. If you are so paralyzed that you can't get out of bed or get dressed and leave the house, you have some other issue(s). This goes way beyond empathy for a friend of a friend's situation (even this). This triggered something else (whether you're aware or unaware), you need some help.
I think I know where you are coming from. Sometimes you hear about something dreadful happening to someone and you take it all to heart as if that person was close to you. It means you have a heart, you have compassion, and I think you are a lovely sensitive person. As you get older you will learn to accept life's tragedies a little better because you will be exposed to so much. Sometimes bad things happen to good people.